And when we go to the Prayer Call, we are ready with no prospect, but with expectation.
We dispose ourselves without profits, but with enthusiasm.
We dispose ourselves with humility, without achievements.
We are willing... to listen complacently.
A complaisant listening that does not imply obligation, or obedience, or mandate, or order.
A complaisant listening that supposes… relief
With this disposition, the stress and fatigue –those who ‘prejudice’, condemn, worry, and are in internal discussions or imposed radicalisms-... all this... it is necessary at least to be postponed!
To be postponed to enter into the unlimited; to enter into the infinite. To enter, from here, into the perceptive, the sensitive, beyond our corporeal nature.
Attending the Prayer Call implies an unlimited awareness of the "immensurable" –not measurable- of Creation, whatever the opinion about it; that, in any case, it will be just an opinion... not far but very far away, from what Creation is.
To not get complicated, some people join... the Big Bang idea; others take refuge in the performance of a divinity... with many human characteristics, so many!, that surprises.
Let's see if one day we go to see Paco or Antonio doing a Creation: on the first day he creates a shotgun; the second day, a cannon; the third, a greenhouse; the fourth, a giant lizard; the fifth, a puddle; the sixth... ugh!, just a monument; and the seventh... to rest, of course!
Any resemblance to Genesis is pure coincidence.
But yes, the human conduct is in those battles of feeling the privilege of life in this immense universe.
And the logic and the stories are discussed, with reasons and aversions!... –and what a shame!, right?-, while the number of rich people increase and the poor "progress" –for example. "Progress" means that the number of poor people increase.
You could say that the number of rich people is limited. The number of poor and miserable is unlimited.
The Prayer Sense "places" us –let's say so- among the poor. Yes; those who realize they are in an immensity that cannot bear reason or logic. And the very elements, as a species, so far, only serve to conquer, dominate, control and ‘egocentrize’ and ‘egomaniaze’ human activity.
It seems for a moment –right?- that there are no stars, no other galaxies, no novae, no supernovae, no brown dwarfs, no white dwarfs, no black holes, no... No! Such is the arrogant constriction –arrogant?- that the being of humanity has, that the navel meets the mouth.
This is almost a koan, huh? Almost.
We know, from poverty, that the Prayer Sense calls us to its Goodness, before its Providences, before its Mercies, before its Pieties. Because, placing ourselves before them as a poor expression –very poor!- of what Creation in which each being is immersed may be, resorting to those words is... the closest thing to being thankful for the dawn, thankful for the song of birds, thankful for feeling "possible", thankful to be able to carry on swimming, without sinking into the misery of what happens to us, what is going on around us, of what happened to us, , of what they told us. It is the closest we have from our poverty, seeking to feel Mercy, Goodness, Providence..., the tenderness of the snow, the calmness of the brook, the living nostalgia of clouds…
Oh!... Entering into that call... is mercy; that we must apply in our condemns, in our moments of accusation, in our moments of incapability or clumsiness that we could selfishly feel. Yes, "selfishly", because the fact of perceiving those self-aggressions should wake us up to training that does not... not "self-restrict" our sorrows. Oh! If for a moment we reference them with others, we would be almost angels or archangels.
Is this interpreted as a comfort? All right. Is there any evil in comforting yourself? Isn't consolation a modification project, a healing intention? Do we not comfort the child when he loses his ball? Should we ban it rationally?
The Prayer Call us... ‘en-tails’ –yes, it is its intention- other airs without agonies, without threats, but it does not separate us from our being. No. It does not separate us from our being. It distils –the Prayer Call- fragrances, for us to... amplify our awareness of living and discover that coexistence with everything created.
Let the dawn be, from the praying point of view, a lullaby, a lullaby… of awaken ones!...
And we can, without shame, exclaim:
“And to nanny nanny,
Naniiita eeeaaaa ...
Wake up the morning star,
that admires you
Oh, that admires you”.
That morning star, yes, that seems to admire us by announcing that we are immersed in the Mystery. But... the Mystery that does not oppress! That lets us babble in secrets. But it is a Mystery, so cosy! It doesn't… it doesn't impede!
Is perhaps the baby aware –when the mother or the father welcome him, hug him, whisper or sing to him-... is he aware of all the candour they are offering him!, that they give him!, and he needs!? Is he aware of it? Is he restless asking how long it will last, how is it going to be...? Or rather he is pleased, smiles with his grimace, the baby, and accommodates himself... looking for the turns of our clumsy arms?
No, we do not grow in the face of Creation. We do not become adults, elders... We are, in the face of the Creator Mystery, some new-borns, some "dawned", some... "living for love"... or "for a love" –just to name something that doesn’t have a name.
Oh! Yes! The promises are coming –yes! Yes: those that swarm every time a cycle starts, and that arise from intention and from... will! But they usually only count with sacrifice, effort, work –in short, personal importance- to manage giving up drinking, quit smoking, earn more money, emigrate, get such power or something else...; which in itself is neither good nor bad, but... as it emerges away from Creation, as its own personal importance, year after year they fail... to a greater or lesser extent. And it culminates with the gloomy sentence of personal importance: "I can't!... I can't...".
Always with the power on the back! Always with personal power: whether or not I can!
No... couldn’t the idea arise –now that we are in a prayerful moment- to submit –without submission, simply as a sample!- our promises of change, of evolution, of attitude!..., cannot we show them to Clemency, to Goodness, to Providence, to Piety... that evidently occurs in this Universe, for life to happen!?
And isn't it that, when we do so, sacrifice, pain, renunciation of "but", of "I can't!" is not required?
And by shifting that personal importance, Mercy, Goodness, Piety comes in...; that –we insist- they are words that seek to bring us closer to the Mystery of Creation, but no doubt words remain short. But they become big and obvious!, when we open ourselves to them.
And without losing our capabilities, our resources, our means, we address expectations, promises, with the firm decision that, if they are accurate, if we are aware of their need, by showing them, and by losing our criteria of power “to achieve or not”, if we know how to place ourselves in that dimension, “without a doubt”, the promise will be fulfilled, it will develop.
And since one doubts so many times of confidence in oneself and others, and one is in doubt, let's show to what it calls us –the Sense of Prayer- our needs, as if the Mystery did not know them. Because we are poor!
We are poor, of that poverty that has not needs, that does not tie up, that does not claim…; it feels immensely grateful when it drinks water, when he tries a snack or when he can rest calmly.
Let's practice that poverty, that humility... in its beauty, which allows us to get closer to each other. Let's open the sincere sample!, of what we need.
Let’s feel –for a moment, at least!- that the achievement –without profit, but the achievement- of that promise, of that need, is not in our hands!
We are actors, but the script, the play... is a mystery that spills out at all times.
And for a moment, let's stop being who we are!, and simply show our aspirations, that they are not –obviously- at the expense of suffering, pain or harm to others, but they are... those aspirations that so often embarrass us just to think about them, or so many times we have failed pretending to achieve them.
May the return of the mundane, of the quotidian, of what we are up to, meet that luminaire of Providence, Mercy, Goodness, Piety...
Willing to feel removed to other perspectives, but pleased!, complaisant!...